Here's to life!

I'm not sure why but I keep expecting the worst.

December of last year was hard for me but currently I'm happier than I ever have been.

Which is scary.

I keep waiting for something to fall apart.

I've been bracing myself anytime something has come up that's slightly negative.

Like ope here it is.

The thing that's going to break me.

The thing that's going to pull me backwards.

It's not that I think I don't deserve happiness but it's rather I've never been this stable within myself.

I've lost 100 lbs and not gained it back.

If anything I've continued and managed to enjoy life to the fullest whilst doing so. My plans come January will get me even closer to my goals.

I'm in my first healthy adult relationship full of communication, love, acceptance, honesty, and peace.

The chaos that has existed in my heart for a couple of years, honestly, has chilled the fuck out.

Sweat Shop is amazing. Classes are growing, the courses being written right now are life changing, coaching clients are succeeding, and our community is just the best. We have a plan to just keep GROWING.

As sisters deciding their next business move- we're beyond excited. Talk about leveling UP. Even what we've been doing locally with other businesses has been so exciting.

I'm finding more of my style, my voice, and my peace everyday.

Family and friendships are solid.

In moments of stress or panic I haven't lost my shit (as much as I usually do)- there have been many moments like this. Every single worry or problem that has come up has been figure-out-able. (Shoutout to Marie)

Now I just have to work on accepting this. Accepting that life can be balanced.

It's time to get the fuck out of fight-or-flight mode and lower these cortisol levels.

We all deserve to be happy and find beauty in just naturally working through a hard situation rather than allowing it to control us.

Life is never super calm or perfect but it also doesn't mean that life constantly has to be negative and overwhelming.

Damn, I hit 25 and feel like my frontal cortex has developed!

I'm going to eat lunch and then do some "adult" shit. Have a happy Tuesday!

P.S. I'm sorry I missed last week. I seriously was sucked up into life and boom it was the next week. I know you were all sad to not read my glorious rambles.